Lately, Sydney is hearing a lot about agents and conflict of interests! People is talking about how agents may have special relationships with publishers, or may not work in client's best interests if agent is also acting as a publisher.
Sures, these is all conflicts of interest! Sydney loves them all!
But there is other conflicts of interest that ALWAYS go on with agents, and people never thinks about! These are Sydney's favorites, because nobody ever complains about them! They is so deeply rooted in the agenting business they is invisible! Is like money in the bank!
In fact, IS money in the bank Sydney is talking about! See, all money flows through agent! Publisher sends check! Sydney cashes check plenty-quick! Then, Sydney deducts her well-deserved 20% commission! Finally, Sydney cuts check for rest of moneys and sends to writer!
But here is where conflict-of-interest comes on. Writer's best interest is that Sydney should get money to writer as soon as possible! Agency law says agents first interest should be client's first interest...
But Sydney is just a little cat (agent), and does not study the law, much less obey it! Sydney's interest is that money stays with Sydney as long as possible! Sydney knows that "money in the bank" means "interest," and interest is money that STAYS in Sydney's bank!
So, if check comes in on Wednesday, Sydney cashes right away, but pretends not to get it until Friday. If gets on Friday, can't log it in until Monday. If does not log till Monday, cannot send to accounting until Tuesday. But accounting person is taking personal days till Thursday. Then authorization to cut check doesn't get on Sydney's desk till SECOND Friday. Then Sydney cannot sign till Monday, but is in meetings all day, and is out of office on Tuesday and then everything is backed up on Wednesday and then signs on Thursday, but accidentally signs in wrong place, and accounting person doesn't find it becauses starts maternity leave, and then temp replacing her doesn't know where anything is...
Six weeks later, if writer even knows about money, if even suspects money exists, they is stuck staring at mail-box, wondering where money is! If they calls, Sydney says, "the check's in the mail!" Thanks-you crappy USPS! Sydney can always blames it on you! "Oh," says Sydney,
"you should have it by now! Sydney will send another check soon as can get paperwork through! Only accounting person just started two year sabbatical in Tibet! May be slight, delay!"
Meanwhile, Sydney's "conflicted interest" is turning into "compounded interest!" See! Sydney makes clever joke! HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
You got that check yet?
Is good to be me!
Bad Agent Sydney wants to hear from YOU! Please leave your queries, questions, or comments! Perhaps Sydney's response will inspire a future post! While Bad Agent Sydney is not taking on new clients at this time, she is well aware that ALL WRITERS NEED CAT SUPERVISION! Little known fact that this instinctive talent that ALL cats have! Writers (and everyone want to be writer!), do to local shelter and ADOPT HOMELESS KITTY TODAY! Use this LINK to find shelter near you! GO! AGENT SYDNEY SAYS!
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