Showing posts with label money. Show all posts
Showing posts with label money. Show all posts

Thursday, February 19, 2015

Sydney:

Clients, perhaps you have noticed that your advances has been getting smaller! This is not Sydney's problem, and you is not Sydney's only client! Sydney is not about individual advances! Fifteen (wait, twenty!) percent of your advance is not much for Sydney, but this is okay! Sydney is about quantity, not quality! Fifteen percent (no, twenty!) of a lot of crappy advances will keep Bad Agent Sydney in the tunas!

It is good to be me! (You, not so much.)

                                         -PURRRRR!

Bad Agent Sydney wants to hear from YOU! Please leave your queries, questions, or comments! Perhaps Sydney's response will inspire a future post! While Bad Agent Sydney is not taking on new clients at this time, she is well aware that ALL WRITERS NEED CAT SUPERVISION!  Little known fact that this instinctive talent that ALL cats have!  Writers (and everyone want to be writer!), do to local shelter and ADOPT HOMELESS KITTY TODAY!  Use this LINK to find shelter near you!  GO!  AGENT SYDNEY SAYS! If you found this post useful or fun, please be aware that Sydney has NEEDS! Toys. Catnip. TUNA! Support Sydney (and her people) by digging deep and sending a "thank-you" donantion her way. PURRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR! (You cannot resist my hypnotic "pay up!" purr! PURRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!

Saturday, August 6, 2011

Conflict of Interesting

Sydney:

Lately, Sydney is hearing a lot about agents and conflict of interests!  People is talking about how agents may have special relationships with publishers, or may not work in client's best interests if agent is also acting as a publisher.  
Sures, these is all conflicts of interest!  Sydney loves them all!


But there is other conflicts of interest that ALWAYS go on with agents, and people never thinks about!  These are Sydney's favorites, because nobody ever complains about them!  They is so deeply rooted in the agenting business they is invisible!  Is like money in the bank!


In fact, IS money in the bank Sydney is talking about!  See, all money flows through agent!  Publisher sends check!  Sydney cashes check plenty-quick!  Then, Sydney deducts her well-deserved 20% commission!  Finally, Sydney cuts check for rest of moneys and sends to writer!


But here is where conflict-of-interest comes on.  Writer's best interest is that Sydney should get money to writer as soon as possible! Agency law says agents first interest should be client's first interest...


But Sydney is just a little cat (agent), and does not study the law, much less obey it!  Sydney's interest is that money stays with Sydney as long as possible!  Sydney knows that "money in the bank" means "interest," and interest is money that STAYS in Sydney's bank!


So, if check comes in on Wednesday, Sydney cashes right away, but pretends not to get it until Friday.  If gets on Friday, can't log it in until Monday.  If does not log till Monday, cannot send to accounting until Tuesday.  But accounting person is taking personal days till Thursday.  Then authorization to cut check doesn't get on Sydney's desk till SECOND Friday.  Then Sydney cannot sign till Monday, but is in meetings all day, and is out of office on Tuesday and then everything is backed up on Wednesday and then signs on Thursday, but accidentally signs in wrong place, and accounting person doesn't find it becauses starts maternity leave, and then temp replacing her doesn't know where anything is...


Six weeks later, if writer even knows about money, if even suspects money exists, they is stuck staring at mail-box, wondering where money is!  If they calls, Sydney says, "the check's in the mail!"  Thanks-you crappy USPS!  Sydney can always blames it on you!  "Oh," says Sydney,
"you should have it by now!  Sydney will send another check soon as can get paperwork through!  Only accounting person just started two year sabbatical in Tibet!  May be slight, delay!"



Meanwhile, Sydney's "conflicted interest" is turning into "compounded interest!"   See!  Sydney makes clever joke!  HAHAHAHAHAHAHA! 


You got that check yet?


Is good to be me!


PURRRRR!




 Bad Agent Sydney wants to hear from YOU! Please leave your queries, questions, or comments! Perhaps Sydney's response will inspire a future post! While Bad Agent Sydney is not taking on new clients at this time, she is well aware that ALL WRITERS NEED CAT SUPERVISION!  Little known fact that this instinctive talent that ALL cats have!  Writers (and everyone want to be writer!), do to local shelter and ADOPT HOMELESS KITTY TODAY!  Use this LINK to find shelter near you!  GO!  AGENT SYDNEY SAYS!

 If you found this post useful or fun, please be aware that Sydney has NEEDS! Toys. Catnip. TUNA! Support Sydney (and her people) by digging deep and sending a "thank-you" donantion her way. PURRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR! (You cannot resist my hypnotic "pay up!" purr! PURRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!

Tuesday, October 5, 2010

Sydney Wisdom of the Day: A Drop in the Water Bowl

Sydney:

Dear client,


Yes, you is right.  Sydney has made some little mistake in handling your money!  Maybe she forgot to send your share that royalty check, or those monies from that foreign-rights sale, or that low-dollar Hollywood option.  And maybe while she was at it, maybe she forgot to send along royalty statement or other paperwork that would give you some idea you was even owed money.  Thing is, some money that maybe should have gone to you didn't.


You caught me!  Mys bad!  Hey!  Mistakes are made!  


But it was not a big mistake.  Just a little check!  Maybe a hundred bucks.  Maybe a little more.  Maybe a little less.  Certainly not enough to worry your pretty little head over!  Just a drop!  Just a drop!


But you is just one client.  Sydney has many clients.  Hundreds clients!  A drop here.  A drop there.  It adds up!


Hmmm.  Sydney's water bowl is suddenly overflowing!  How did this happen?


Is good to be me!


PURRRRRRRRRR!  

Bad Agent Sydney wants to hear from YOU! Please leave your queries, questions, or comments! Perhaps Sydney's response will inspire a future post! While Bad Agent Sydney is not taking on new clients at this time, she is well aware that ALL WRITERS NEED CAT SUPERVISION!  Little known fact that this instinctive talent that ALL cats have!  Writers (and everyone want to be writer!), do to local shelter and ADOPT HOMELESS KITTY TODAY!  Use this LINK to find shelter near you!  GO!  AGENT SYDNEY SAYS!

If you found this post useful or fun, please be aware that Sydney has NEEDS! Toys. Catnip. TUNA! Support Sydney (and her people) by digging deep and sending a "thank-you" donantion her way. PURRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR! (You cannot resist my hypnotic "pay up!" purr! PURRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!

Monday, February 22, 2010

Sydney Wisdom of the Day: It's only TUNA!

Sydney:


Many writers want to sign with Bad Agent Sydney because "she works for tuna."  

Stupid writers do no understand tuna = money!


You sign contract, I get 15%.  Tuna, dollars, quatloos, does not matter.  I get 15%!


Stupid writers only look at dollar signs.  In publishing, for writers, and for me, many things is money!  Subrights is money.  Royalty terms is money.  Time is money.  Even reversion-clause is money!  

Long as stupid writers only look at dollar signs, nobody paying attention to what I do with everything else.  Nobody notice that semi-truck just back up to Sydney's office with daily tuna delivery!


Writers should treat everything in business like money, but don't.  

Is good to be me!

So don't you worry your pretty little head about it!


PURRRRR!



Bad Agent Sydney wants to hear from YOU!
Please leave your queries, questions, or comments! Perhaps Sydney's response will inspire a future post!

If you found this post useful or fun, please be aware that Sydney has NEEDS! Toys. Catnip. TUNA! Support Sydney (and her people) by digging deep and sending a "thank-you" donantion her way. PURRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR! (You cannot resist my hypnotic "pay up!" purr! PURRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!





Wednesday, January 27, 2010

Sydney Wisdom of the Day: Foreign Rights Money


Sydney:


The good thing about foreign-rights money, is that sometimes checks just drop out of the mail totally unexpectedly.


The better part for me, is that these are checks that nobody knows about, and nobody needs to know about.


EVER!

Got to keep the Greenie jar full somehow, don't I?



PURRRRRR!

If you found this post useful or fun, please be aware that Sydney has NEEDS! Toys. Catnip. TUNA! Support Sydney (and her people) by digging deep and sending a "thank-you" donantion her way. PURRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR! (You cannot resist my hypnotic "pay up!" purr! PURRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!